Tec overload...

So...it's been a while, but I think I am safe now. This seems to be the only real place to air my thoughts out. I have been unfaithful using myspace and facebook...I have not tweeted though...so that should count for something.

Those forums are great for catching up, but blogging with regularly anonymity...well that' s here and that's what I need.

I find myself in a dark cloud of confusion. I have a great life but I want more. What, I do not know but I find myself wondering further and further into the unknown, daydreaming about dirty pretty things and lost in my own mind.

I know it's wrong but I can't help myself, they are just thoughts no? I see myself outside of my personality bending my morals and accepting the pleasure from doing so...but then I see the reality and snap back. I am giving myself whiplash. I feel almost primal and uncharacteristically cold. What causes me to think this way?

It shall pass but in a month or so I will feel this again...I have to let the past go. I should build on the future but I can't...I need that violent, fulfilling end to move on.